Clik here to view.
Man-on-Pause
Man-on-pause is happening in our household. Hot flashes, night sweats, irritability. Yes, man-on-pause is definitely here. Of course, I’m referring to the dreaded menopause, but my husband renamed it...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Finishing Strong
My last chemotherapy session is tomorrow, and I can’t tell you how ready I am to be done. This has been a long haul. I’m over it. I’m ready to finish treatment and stay cancer-free forever. Tomorrow’s...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Defeated. Triumphant. Confused.
One month before diagnosis. Completely unaware of what was to come. (December 2011) It’s been about a week since my very last chemotherapy treatment, and I’m feeling different than I expected....
View ArticleClik here to view.
Cancer Etiquette
Is there really such a thing as “cancer etiquette?” The answer is a booming “Yes!” I have been asked frequently about what not to say to someone going through a cancer battle, and have decided to...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Breaking the Bubble via Dude Ranch
Entry to the ranch. (May 2013) Am I the only one who feels stuck inside of a bubble oftentimes? Maybe you don’t get out very much, stay inside a small radius of your home, or haven’t experienced as...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Disease VS Diagnosis
Trusting in something bigger. (May 2013) I have come to the realization that for the last 16 months I have only faced my disease (cancer), rather than coming head on with my diagnosis. This is not...
View ArticleClik here to view.
No Hair, Don’t Care
Sometimes, as a cancer patient, you want to blend in with the crowd. Blend in with those around you who have hair. Because, after all, being bald attracts attention and unwanted stares. Being bald...
View ArticleClik here to view.
In Tears, There is Strength
Grief: (n) “Keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss; sharp sorrow; painful regret.” Loss: (n) “The state or feeling of grief when deprived of someone or something of value.” These...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Unexpected Early Results
Yesterday morning, I woke up early and drove to the hospital for my three-month follow-up CT scan. Generally I have a fair share of “scanxiety,” yet that morning was different. Maybe my nerves were...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Faithful Friends and The First Season
Alongside us on this crazy roller coaster through cancer, two of our dearest friends have been planted. They have joined us at appointments, surgeries, chemo cocktails, and numerous cry sessions. They...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Hello, My Name Is…
Stephanie. 26 years old. Christian. Woman. Wife. Daughter. Sister. Friend. This is who I was before my diagnosis. And, as I’m learning, this is who I still am. (February 2012) Cancer does a lot to a...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Life List
It’s been a while since I’ve poured words into this blog. I suppose I’ve gotten swept up in the seemingly never-ending voyage of rediscovering what life looks like now. I feel like this process could...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Joy Above Jealousy
“‘Tis the season for having babies… If only it were that simple for all of us. From my earliest memories, I have longed to be a mother. I wanted children and figured by now I’d have already been...
View ArticleClik here to view.
30 Days
30 days until the beginning of a new voyage. Arising while the sun is still in slumber. Lacing up shoes and adorning the best running gear. Treading outside, nervous, and anxious for the impending...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Being Still Amidst Scanxiety
Yesterday I made the familiar walk into my second home. The hospital. I hadn’t been through those doors in over three months, and the typically all familiar halls were strangely foreign this time. For...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Our Plan, His Will
These past few days have been entirely orchestrated by God, of that I am sure. Tuesday night, our church had it’s monthly women’s event, and I was asked to be a small group leader for the evening. One...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Not So Fast
(Guest post by Matt) Stephanie and I have spent a few days in the hospital, and she seems to have been progressing better than she has after previous surgeries. When they rolled her out of the post-op...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Groundhog Day
The one with Bill Murray, not Punxsutawney Phil. Getting cancer over, and over, and over again is comparable to the movie Groundhog Day. One season ends and I wake up expecting a new one to begin, only...
View ArticleClik here to view.
The Question of Depression
I’ll admit it. I’ve been MIA for the past month. My absence was not intentional. I just couldn’t get the words out into my blog. However, it was nothing like writer’s block. It was much deeper. I...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Cancerland
A place where chemo drips freely. Hair is a rare sight to be seen. Tubes, treatment, and trials are common occurrences. Hospital bands are shackles bound to the arms of warriors. And cancer is...
View Article